{"id":12137,"date":"2023-03-01T20:08:00","date_gmt":"2023-03-02T01:08:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/carehop.ca\/blog\/the-dos-and-donts-of-talking-to-your-parents-about-home-care\/"},"modified":"2023-09-19T02:04:53","modified_gmt":"2023-09-19T06:04:53","slug":"the-dos-and-donts-of-talking-to-your-parents-about-home-care","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/carehop.ca\/fr\/blog\/the-dos-and-donts-of-talking-to-your-parents-about-home-care\/","title":{"rendered":"The DOs and DON\u2019Ts of Talking to Your Parents About Home Care"},"content":{"rendered":"\n\n\n\n[et_pb_section fb_built=\u00a0\u00bb1″ admin_label=\u00a0\u00bbsection\u00a0\u00bb _builder_version=\u00a0\u00bb4.16″ global_colors_info=\u00a0\u00bb{}\u00a0\u00bb theme_builder_area=\u00a0\u00bbpost_content\u00a0\u00bb][et_pb_row _builder_version=\u00a0\u00bb4.16″ _module_preset=\u00a0\u00bbdefault\u00a0\u00bb global_colors_info=\u00a0\u00bb{}\u00a0\u00bb theme_builder_area=\u00a0\u00bbpost_content\u00a0\u00bb][et_pb_column type=\u00a0\u00bb4_4″ _builder_version=\u00a0\u00bb4.16″ _module_preset=\u00a0\u00bbdefault\u00a0\u00bb global_colors_info=\u00a0\u00bb{}\u00a0\u00bb theme_builder_area=\u00a0\u00bbpost_content\u00a0\u00bb][et_pb_text _builder_version=\u00a0\u00bb4.17.6″ _module_preset=\u00a0\u00bbdefault\u00a0\u00bb hover_enabled=\u00a0\u00bb0″ global_colors_info=\u00a0\u00bb{}\u00a0\u00bb theme_builder_area=\u00a0\u00bbpost_content\u00a0\u00bb sticky_enabled=\u00a0\u00bb0″]

It can be upsetting for children to watch their aging parents struggle to complete their day-to-day tasks. In many cases, in-home elder care is the most prudent choice to ensure your mom and dad can live safely and independently at home.<\/p>\n

However, many older people resist the idea of in-home care. It\u2019s a perfectly normal reaction for people who have lived with support all their lives. They might not want to burden anyone or admit to needing help with simple activities such as dressing, grooming, bathing, or toileting.<\/p>\n

Opening the conversation about home care might be met with resistance or even anger. To keep discussions moving forward positively and peacefully, we\u2019ve listed five DOs and five DON’Ts when bringing up the subject. If applied correctly, these tips will help your parents overcome their concerns and eventually accept the hired help you\u2019re lovingly suggesting.<\/p>\n

The Six DOs of talking to your parents about home care<\/h2>\n

Here are six great ways to open the conversation about home care with your parents and keep the dialogue going if they\u2019re not open to the idea at first.<\/p>\n

Do show empathy for their situation<\/h3>\n

Growing old can be difficult for many people, especially when dealing with health conditions such as anxiety, depression, dementia, chronic illness, or mobility issues. When mishaps happen, avoid saying anything negative such as, \u201cThis is why you need help!\u201d This kind of talk can lead to sadness, shame, and a reluctance to accept your advice on homecare. Think about how you would feel in their place, and always show kindness and empathy to your aging parents. This approach will advance their acceptance of getting help.<\/p>\n

DO stress that they\u2019re not losing their independence<\/h3>\n

The first thing that might come to a parent\u2019s mind is that home care will rob them of their independence. The truth is that home care actually enhances independence and allows your parents to still live at home. The home caregiver is just there to provide a helping hand, not take over your parent\u2019s life. Be sure to stress that their caregiver is an assistant and that your parents will always be in charge.<\/p>\n

DO research home care options<\/h3>\n

When faced with the prospect of homecare, mom and dad will likely have many questions. Have the information ready by doing your research beforehand. There is plenty of authoritative information on the Internet and home care websites that may answer all of their questions. You can also ask a friend whose parents are already receiving home care. Your parents will appreciate your efforts to be informed and consider the matter more in-depth.<\/p>\n

DO take baby steps<\/h3>\n

It\u2019s wonderful to be proactively bringing up the discussion about home care. However, it\u2019s important not to expect a final decision after the first conversation. Your parents will need time to absorb the idea, think about their options, and make a choice that\u2019s best for them. Take it slow and be patient \u2013 this is a life changing decision that deserves ample time for reflection. A trial run might be a good idea to see if they enjoy the home care experience.<\/p>\n

DO tell them that you\u2019ll still be there<\/h3>\n

Your parents might be afraid that their children, grandchildren, and others will stop visiting if the caregiver is there, especially if one or more of them have already been providing care. Provide reassurance that a caregiver is enabling you to have more quality time with them. Make sure they know how important you are to them and that you\u2019ll always be there, whether or not there\u2019s a caregiver in place.<\/p>\n

DO practice good self-care<\/h3>\n

Lying awake at night worrying about your parents\u2019 reluctance to accept home care won\u2019t do anyone any good. Find a positive outlet for stress, such as exercise, hobbies you enjoy, or simply talking to a friend. You can also seek support from an online group with people in similar situations<\/a>. Let go of negative emotions and care for yourself with as much love as you would your parents.<\/p>\n

The six DON\u2019Ts of talking to your parents about home care<\/h2>\n

Now that we know the DOs, let\u2019s have a look at the DON\u2019Ts, and how you can turn adverse reactions into opportunities to keep the idea of home care open.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T argue with them<\/h3>\n

Mom and dad might not feel they need home care right now, and want to remain in control of their life and care decisions. Becoming frustrated and arguing won\u2019t convince them and may actually strengthen their resolve. Honoring their wishes and maintaining a good relationship with your parents is much more productive, so they\u2019ll be more open to discussing the issue again down the road.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T make unwarranted assumptions<\/h3>\n

If your parents resist the idea of home care, don\u2019t assume it\u2019s because they\u2019re being stubborn, difficult, or unwilling to \u201cface facts\u201d. They might have genuine underlying concerns, such as letting a stranger in the house or whether they can afford home care. Try to get to the root cause of their resistance so it can be addressed and solved in a frank and positive manner.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T get frustrated during the process<\/h3>\n

It might seem that your conversations sometimes move one step forward and two steps back. This is normal when discussing vital topics such as home care. Trying a different approach at a different time might get better results and move your parents closer to a decision.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T lose focus on the subject at hand<\/h3>\n

Accepting home care is a big step for most older adults that requires careful consideration. You might be tempted to also suggest they join walking groups, bridge clubs, or other beneficial but off-topic activities. Too many decisions at once might overwhelm your parents at this critical juncture. It\u2019s much more practical to divert your energy to helping your parents explore home care options.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T treat your parents like children<\/h3>\n

Scolding mom and dad for having wishes contrary to yours is counter-productive. They might appear to be acting childishly, but your parents are still adults and deserve to be treated with respect. This also applies when they occasionally forget to take medications, shower, or eat. Being kind, patient, and respectful will help keep the conversation about home care positive and progressive.<\/p>\n

DON\u2019T do it alone<\/h3>\n

Your parents may disregard your concerns simply because you\u2019re their child. They recognize you mean well but might not consider you an authority on care needs. Try to bring their primary care physicians, specialists, nurses, and peers into the conversation. Mom and dad might respond better to their advice and realize that home care might be an ideal approach to getting them the help they need.<\/p>\n

If you need an outside opinion with no obligation, give CareHop a call<\/a>. We\u2019re always here when you need us.<\/p>\n

Quality in-home elder care in Etobicoke, Toronto West, Mississauga, and Brampton<\/h2>\n

CareHop provides safe, reliable in-home care when your elderly loved ones need help with everyday tasks or specialized Alzheimer\u2019s disease and dementia care<\/a>. We specialize in delivering quality services such as homemaking and meal preparation<\/a>, personal care<\/a>, activities, and casual companionship<\/a> that will help your loved one live independently and with confidence.<\/p>\n

Get in touch with us today<\/a> for a free, no-obligation discussion to discover how we can help you.<\/p>[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]\n\n\n\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It can be upsetting for children to watch their aging parents struggle to complete their day-to-day tasks. In many cases, in-home elder care is the most prudent choice to ensure your mom and dad can live safely and independently at home. However, many older people resist the idea of in-home care. It\u2019s a perfectly normal […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":12138,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[22],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-12137","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-homecare"],"yoast_head":"\nIn-home elder care I A guide for talking to your loved ones<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"In many cases, in-home elder care is the most prudent choice to ensure your mom and dad can live safely and independently at home. 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